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[personal profile] romyhorse



I remember when me and Mary-Sue used to do this... until the kids came along.  First it was the twins, then it was her job... I miss the old days...
"Is that uniform still itching you?"
"Why don't we do something about that?"

Who cares about plasma TVs?  Now that we've moved out here we've got a big garden, lot's of space and fresh air for kids to play in.  I'm sure Jennifer will come round to the idea.

*bash bash*

Tidying the garden!
*bang bang*
Checking out the specials at the supermarket!
*thump thump*
Is this what my life has come to!
*whack whack*
Coral has spent all her life being the perfect mother, and now the perfect grandmother, but god, is she boring!  Thank goodness for all those "meetings" and "conferences" I had to attend, mind you, now I'm retired I'm going to have to think up some other excuses...


"You make the best ham sandwiches Nina!"
"Thank you!  What are your plans for today?"
"I'm going to invite Mortimer over, Cassandra has been getting worked up about the wedding so I thought I'd give him a break.  What about you?"
"Oh, nothing much..."

"Yes, yes Cassandra!  We've already had this conversation!  If you don't stop calling me I won't have time to do all the jobs you keep asking me to do!  I'll see you tomorrow, please don't call me tonight, I'll be too busy to answer the phone."


"I think I need to find myself a part-time job, I'm not used to sitting around the house all day."
"But I thought you were looking forward to your retirement!"
"Yes... I was, but... but it wasn't what I expected.  I need a bit more... stimulation."


"What the hell do you think you are doing with the hired help!  For goodness sake dad, what's mum going to say?"
"Look Lilith, it was just a spur of the moment thing... it just happened.  Please don't tell your mother!  Please!"

"Oh my god, that is so gross!  Take it upstairs you two!"
"You're just jealous Sis'."
"Yeah right, as if I'd ever be jealous of you, or him!"
"You are such a skank!"
"You are going to pay for that!"
"Touch a nerve did I?"


"Don't you ever call me that name again!  Sis!"


"Hey Mortimer!  I thought you could do with a break, why don't you come over.  I'm sure I can think of something to help you relax."
"Okay, I'll see you soon."

Rememer, classy not trashy... this isn't Don, this is a very wealthy, very elderly man... just like Michael.  And he left me a nice little inheritance, it's a pity it didn't last as long as I thought it would....


"That's great Dirk, you'll got some talent.  Maybe you should think about becoming an artist."
"No offense dad, but no way!  I want a job that's going to make me rich!  Art is fine as a hobby, but you can't make decent money from it."
"We'll see, we'll see..."

Across Town

"You're going to grow up big and strong, just like your -sniff- daddy. "

"That pizza just tastes too good, mummy's going to have just one more slice."


"Mummy needs to stop eating all the pizza, those jeans are getting too tight for me!  I wonder where Dustin is? He didn't say he was working today.  Nevermind, lets go and play!"

"Bus! B-U-S Bus!  Good boy."


"Hi Don!  I'm wearing a sexy, silk slip and your favourite perfume."
"That's right, Obsession!"
"See you later stud!"


To hell with the classy!  Trashy works every time!
"You caught me trying on my new lingerie, I bought it for the wedding.  Do you like it?"
"It's as sexy as you!  How am I supposed to concentrate on the wedding knowing what you're wearing under your dress?"
That's the whole idea Morty!


"Dad!  I'm home!  Can we build a treehouse?"


"Mum, don't go in there!"
"Lilith!  I've had a lousy day, get out of my way!  I've had enough of your insolence.  Why can't you be more like Angela?!"


"What the hell is going on here?"
"Um, uh, she, I mean Kaylynn, her uniform, it was itching her. I, uh, was giving her some, um, talcum powder.  Yes, that's it, I was giving her some talcum powder to stop the itching!"
"In your underwear?!"
"Uh, yeah, I... I just got out of the shower... and..."
"Your hair isn't wet!"
"Um, I dried it?"

"Get her out of here!  And put some clothes on, both of you!"
"You know Mary-Sue, this would never have happened if you hadn't complained about her old uniform, the new one is really scratchy."

What am I going to do?  Was it really so innocent?  It wouldn't be the first time... No! No, Daniel wouldn't do that to me...


"Oh Mortimer!  You are so naughty!"

"Dina!  What are you doing with Cassandra's father!"
"Oh! Err, hi Don.  I was just showing him my... umm... Look Don, me and Mortimer, we've been dating for a while now.  You and I finished a long time ago, remember?  And you're marrying Cassandra tomorrow, remember?"
"Yes, the wedding, of course.  Sorry to barge in there Mortimer, be sure to tell Cassandra I'm real excited about tomorrow.  Dina, can a have a word?  About the wedding?"
"Excuse me a minute Mortimer."

"What are you doing?"
"I'm looking after my interests!"
"That's my father-in-law-to-be you're necking!"
"Well put it this way, if we're both living under the same roof it will solve a lot of problems."
"Hmmm.  I never thought of it that way....  Is Nina home?"

"Is everything okay Dina?"
"Yes, nothing to worry about!"
"Now where were we?"


This is the last thing I need!  Burning down the house the night before my wedding.  I hope my wedding dress doesn't smell of smoke...  Can anything more go wrong?


Mary-Sue - stony silence
Angela - I'm going to eat my dinner as fast as I can and get out of here
Lilith - "So dad, um, how's things?"

"Please excuse me, I've got a headache, I need to lie down."
Mary-Sue is giving me the silent treatment, but I think she's fallen for it.  If she was going to throw me out she would have done it by now.  Just have to keep out of her way for a few days...


"Hi Dirk.  Do you want to hang out?  Things are pretty crazy and I could do with someone to talk to."


"What did you want to talk about?"
"Just shut up and kiss me!"
"Well, if you insist!"



"Have you missed me?"
"Come here tiger and I'll show you!"


"Doesn't look like Dustin's coming home tonight.  He must be working the nightshift with Gordon.  I wish he would call and let me know.  Oh well, off to bed for mummy and Beau."



Jesus!  How am I supposed to look good tomorrow if I don't get any sleep! Nina!  Nina!  Wake up!


I haven't done this in years!  Why haven't I?  I guess life just took over... I need to do things like this more often!


I'll show them!  "What can't you be like little Miss Perfect?" Ha! I'll show them!



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